Change can be Good.
I wrote “Change is Hard” in May of 2021. It had been a hard year.
2022 has been a pretty good year for me. Maybe I mark that by not having to deal with as much change from the previous two. Maybe because I got more rest this year. I’m also seeing that the settling of so much change in 2020 and 2021 has taken me to a new place. While change can be hard, it also can be good; it can reflect growth. And, why not look for the good when it is certainly inevitable.
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I’m getting ready to start my 10th year as an entrepreneur. In 2014 I hung my shingle as a private studio voice teacher. My business has morphed through the years; the way I run it, operate it, and the way I teach/coach. Many of those changes have been hard, and worth it to bring more joy and ease into running a business so that I can be the coach I want to be for others.
Back in 2018 I wrote a blog on the difference between a Voice Teacher/Coach/Trainer. Long story short, it has been common to hear voice Teacher when referring to someone trained in technique; taking lessons from a technician. Often the term voice Coach has referred to someone who is coaching stylistically, artistically; maybe isn’t as trained in technique. I started using the term voice Trainer, because I was starting to relate the technical side of singing to muscle coordination and strength-training, like we do athletes.
I have been a good technician and trainer for awhile now, and sold that has my most important skill set. What I’ve noticed lately is that I’m a better coach in recent years. I think that has come from my own personal healing and reflections, which has changed my relationship to myself as a human, and also as a musician.
The trauma support and emotional intelligence work that I do translates beautifully into coaching artistic expression, creating artistic goals; and guiding others to find what is important to them.
Singing can just be singing. However, there are many who are drawn who hold a lot of fear, or a traumatic history, and still want to explore it. There is a deeper gravitational pull for many to singing no matter the skill level; because it is primal.
It is healing.
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I know many of you, like myself, have experienced serious pain and loss, and exceptional challenges that have brought unwanted change into your lives these last few years. And often, we are changed because of them.
Through these ordeals and trials, we must take care of our selves; bring self-compassion to the forefront. We must be clear on what we need, and ask for it. We need a solid nurturing support system of people and practices; build it if you don’t have one. They help us endure difficult change.
I had so much unwanted change in 2020 and 2021, I got a little lost and stuck. Thankfully, I found an awesome Grief & Life Transition Coach. Who knew such a thing existed?! My intense melancholy was starting to ooze into all areas of my life by the end of the year. Kelly and I worked together for the first 4 months of this year, and it was immensely helpful in creating clarity of needs, desires, and priorities for my life. If you are ever in a space where you feel lost and stuck, I highly recommend it!
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As I reflect now, I see the goodness that came from some of these unwanted changes.
Dealing with my mother’s Alzheimer’s diagnosis brought me back into therapy, and took me to a whole other level of wellness after a long intense look and processing of some childhood trauma. There were many days these last few years that were hard and miserable, and I was angry and sad, and… I am better for having done the work. My relationships are also more whole and authentic because of it.
And then the pandemic came. The worry, uncertainty, stress and exhaustion that I experienced forced me to make some decisions about my schedule that I’d been contemplating for years. I needed to have fewer contact hours, and I needed to create a schedule clients could fit into, rather than trying to make my schedule around them. That change was immensely helpful for my well being, and in me becoming the kind of teacher/coach I wanted to be.
The pandemic also influenced my move. I figured at some point I would need to leave my beloved luxury apartment (with beautiful pool!), but each year I renewed the lease, not ready for change. 2020 showed me the way out. And, now I have a home with a gorgeous studio space for clients and artistic gatherings.
And, I’ve found the satisfaction that changing my mind can bring. If I believed X, but wondered if life would be better if I could let that go. Yeah, I think I’ll change my thinking around that. Oof! Freeing!
I have a new found flexibility and thoughtfulness in my life from this practice.
The pandemic caused me to slow down my focus on songwriting. I picked up story writing in a different way; my voice could not be still. I adapted to this change quickly, but found myself missing songwriting and my songs. So, I decided it was time to record (stay tuned).
I brought permanent change to my body this year; got my first tattoo! 🌊
I was surprised that I had a short period of mourning (like a day or two) for my bare skin; even inviting wanted change can be a challenge.
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I’ve been teaching singing in some capacity for 22 years. While my education and continuing education has foundational technical roots in what I do, my own personal healing journey and experience in the studio influences the heart and soul of this work.
When I opened my own studio 9 years ago, I began focusing on building community with this work, that is typically very individualized. After all, what is the point of singing songs, if we don’t share them! Surprisingly, our community grew and became closer when we all went online in 2020. We gathered more frequently for awhile, starved for connection.
That change, the one that brought Zoom into our lives, made it easier for me to work with clients outside of Charlotte. See, Change Is Good.
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This time of year I ask my clients to reflect on their desired outcome/goals for voice exploration/work. These goals can change periodically; just like so much else in our lives. You can change your mind and change your focus! I will meet you where you are.
How I can serve YOU?
How can I coach you?
What are your needs and desires around singing, or expressive voice work?
The work can include vocal technique training, vocal strengthening, artist exploration and development (what kind of artist/musician do you want to be?), personal coaching for personal development; coaching on how you want your voice to show up in the world; nervous system regulation work (helpful for anxiety, working through traumas that are stuck in the body). Or, a mixture of it all!
What change might you invite into your life?
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Wishing you contentment and merriment this time of year, and anytime you can get it!
Julie